Shel Silverstein said it best:

“I cannot go to school today”
Said little Peggy Ann McKay.
“I have the measles and the mumps,
A gash, a rash and purple bumps.

My mouth is wet, my throat is dry.
I’m going blind in my right eye.
My tonsils are as big as rocks,
I’ve counted sixteen chicken pox.

And there’s one more – that’s seventeen,
And don’t you think my face looks green?
My leg is cut, my eyes are blue,
It might be the instamatic flu.

Unfortunately, our ending wasn’t as happy as Silverstein: the illness was real and so I stayed home to care for a sick family.

No homework, obviously, unless you’re in English I and you want that extra credit.